She’s one of the world’s biggest stars with a voice that’s instantly recognisable but while Billie Eilish’s life might appear to be one of glamour and access to Hollywood’s biggest parties, it hasn’t been without its struggles. While many of the world’s stars like to safeguard their private lives and keep such experiences away from the eyes or ears of the public, Eilish has instead always been open with her fans. Her red carpet appearances might be known to break the Internet, but her passion lies in music and it’s through her songs that she connects and shares her story with her fans.
In a recent interview with Sunday Times Magazine, the singer detailed the extent of her mental health struggles, which include body dysmorphia, depression and an anxiety so crippling that she couldn’t even sleep in her own bed at night. “I couldn’t be away from my parents. I was worried about what would happen to them, I was worried about what would happen to me, I was worried about being forgotten,” the star explained.
Speaking about their sleeping arrangement, Eilish added: “I couldn’t sleep by myself. If I woke up and my parents weren’t in the bed, and the lights were off, I would scream until they came to the door. And I couldn’t step off the bed in the dark because I was certain that there were scorpions crawling all over the floor.”
In the same interview, Eilish also revealed that despite her fame and the accolades to her name, she still struggles to be alone and spends more time at her parents house than she does in her own home based in Los Angeles. It’s a frank and honest insight into a star who has continued to be open with her fans, never shying away from the harder conversations while also shining a spotlight on mental health struggles.
In having such conversations, Eilish encourages others to speak up and feel less alone. She’s been vocal about body-shakers, even opening up her 2021 Where Do We Go world tour with the powerful statement: “If what I wear is comfortable, I am not a woman. If I shed the layers, I am a slut. Some people hate what I wear, some people praise it. Some people use it to shame others, some people use it to shame me. While I feel your stares, your disapproval or your sighs of relief, if I lived by them, I’d never be able to move.”
The statement continued, “The body I was born with, is it not what you want? If what I wear is comfortable, I am not a woman. If I shed the layers, I am a slut. Though you’ve never seen my body, you still judge it and judge me for it. Why?”
Previously, Eilish also discussed her experience with Tourette’s syndrome, telling David Letterman that she still grapples with tics on a regular basis, while others have gone away over time. “If you film me for long enough, you’re going to see a lot of tics,” she said.
Opening up about how many have responded to her Tourette’s in the past, Eilish revealed: “The most common way people react [to my tics] is they laugh because they think I’m trying to be funny. And I am always left incredibly offended by that.”
But as Eilish went on to express, she’s happy to talk about her Tourette’s Syndrome because it’s something she finds interesting and hopes to shed light on for others, particularly for those who lack understanding around it. “It’s not like I like it, but I feel like it’s part of me. Now, I’m pretty confident in it.”
